Night before last I had a conversation with a lovely Black woman, almost to her mid-thirties, about why she would not date men in their 20’s. I’ve had this conversation countless times with my sisters and I disagree with them all. They should give these young boys a chance and here’s why.
1) Because some of them do have their acts together. Many women use the excuse that they don’t have their acts together financially, emotionally, etc. to not date them. All of the women I’ve talked to swore all men in their 20s off. However, doing this eliminates any chance of finding the ones that do have their act together. Logic dictates that they are out there. And if not, the ones who do have their acts together in their 30s had to start somewhere. Why not get to know them in their 20s.
2) Because you can have fun going out with them just as you can with an older guy. The women I’ve talked to about this say that young men don’t have the same interests or have similar life experiences. But you can say that about anyone. Dating is about getting to know someone new. Sure they may not remember first run episodes of the Cosby show. But in the grand scheme of things, does that really matter.
3) Because they don’t mind being used as boy toys. This is self explanatory but I will elaborate. Some women say that since they would not likely have much in common with young guys to talk about, they would just use them to service them physically. See 2). This guy may be more level headed than a lot of 30 year-old guys you know.
4) Why not? Does it really make sense to sit at home waiting for the right guy who happens to be in their 30s when a nice young one is right there who wants to take you out. If anything, just go out and have fun until that 30s guy comes along. It should be cool as long as you explain to the young guy what’s going on.
5) There’s a shortage of black men anyway so you might as well date them young. I don’t like this reason but I had to put it on here to be comprehesive. If so many black men in their 30s have kids or are in jail, then those in their 20s would be less likely to have such baggage.
I think the The State Of . . . dating for African-American Women would improve if they were not so rigid when it comes to the age requirement. Free your mind and your heart just may follow.
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