Don’t Blame It On Rio!
“There’s a phenomenon sweeping the African American community: Black men traveling to places like Brazil and the Dominican Republic for sex. A new book Don’t Blame It on Rio: The Real Deal Behind Why Men Go to Brazil for Sex [Grand Central Publishing, April 2008] by Jewel Woods and Karen Hunter attempts to get to the heart of this issue and show that it’s bigger than “getting some.” More than Words spoke with Woods who also founded the Renaissance Male Project, a nonprofit advocacy and accountability organization for men and boys. Check out this eye-opening, eyebrow-raising interview with Woods about sex, love, and the widening divide between African American men and women. And when you’re finished, click here to read an excerpt of Don’t Blame It on Rio.”
TheStateOf . . . Rio. Only two words for the authors of this book - STOP SNITCHIN’!
Filed under: Sex
Author: “In a very real sense, the book is about how Brazil has become the new “North” representing “freedom and liberation” in the minds and imaginations of many black men. In particular, the book is about why some of the most coveted and accomplished men in the African American community are increasingly taking physical, and often emotional, and psychological trips away from America and from black women.”
If I were a player, I’d say “Aint nobody spending money just for some coochie.. Coochie is free right here!”
In reality, I don’t knock brothers writing about whatever to honestly make a living.
But….This is pretty much garbage if applied to the masses. I know men who’ve ‘explored’ what Brazil and other countries have to offer. I’d dare not say they were a reprensentation of the masses.
I’ll keep my young, nappy hair having, Jill Scott listening, hoop earring wearing, DISEASE FREE, loving me like no other creature could ever Brown skin bombshell. Yep.
Oh, good morning and blessings… From KING and ‘em.
Mornin’, KJ
If a man wants to go down there, let him. the “program” girls down there are actually more likely to be disease free than the prostitutes here in the U.S. Like in Amsterdam, the government regulates their activity and provides STD testing for these women. (That being said, I would still wear protection.)
I don’t think the Program girls will last long over the next few decades. Brazil is moving up the food chain. They are no longer a third world country and their middle class is getting larger. In fact, I was reading a few months ago that some Brazilians who moved to the U.S. are now moving back home because there are more job opportunities. If that’s the case, these women may be more likely to get “less stressful” jobs.
for a progressive site that claims to be all about the ‘family’…what is up with the phrase ‘ stop smitchin’?
Is that to mean that you endorse black men both married and unmarried who travel to Brazil to sleep with prostitutes?
King James,
“I’ll keep my young, nappy hair having, Jill Scott listening, hoop earring wearing, DISEASE FREE, loving me like no other creature could ever Brown skin bombshell. Yep.”
You echo precisely the same sentiments as my dear hubby!!! How I do appreciate men like you with your impeccable taste!
Thanks Kim… I feel like writing.. about HER
…
um…
even from
miles away
even as
the price of stamps rise
she sends her love with God speed
certified and insured
…priority…
awaiting me at my door step
pretty package with love’s bow
containing my needs
including my wants
and
i
feel
like
a
kid
on Christmas day
again..
and again..
as i sign
my signature of commitment
insuring HER
that in me she can TRUST
and breathe
and then
EXHALE
returning
my parcel of love
to sender…
Okay. When ya’ll encounter a disease free MAN dont say nothin’!
Stop snitching?
And what exactly do you think you are doing by posting this topic?
Haven’t white men been doing this for years? i didn’t read the excerpt but i’ve read several articles about the whole Rio sex thing. In my opinion, to say this ‘phenomenon’ is at all related to the imaginary ‘widening divide between african american men and women’ that bitter sistas love writing and talking about is totally obsurd.
Some men, regardless of race, are interested in having sex with prostitutes in exotic locations. Period.
Soteria,
I was kidding about “Stop Snitchin’.”
The authors of this book are WAY over the top and full of BS if they are saying that brothers are going to Brazil to get away from “black women.”
I dunno. I’ve never been to Brazil. I have nothing against brothers who go, but it can become an addiction too. A friend of mine got shot in the head down there and died too. Gotta watch your back.
Has anyone else noticed that J has the craziest “friends”?
One’s house was batter-rammed in the 80’s.
One just got shot in the head in Brazil.
Many other’s come to his house complaining about their babies, baby’s mama’s or lack thereof.
Some of the female friends are love-sick, breast implant having spinsters.
J, soon I’ma tell you to get some new friends.
Cookie, It’s not about wanting to have sex with prostitutes….it’s about wanting to have sex w/ fine ass freaks…..come on now….we all know Black woman are wayyyy behind when it comes to being nasty……you’ll still think A LOT of things are gross.
I’m just kidding…..I don’t generalize but I do use statistics and averages.
I agree with Cookie. When white men go to third world countries to have sex with women who are poor enough to have to put out and pretend to enjoy it, those men are just adventure seeking vacationers. But when black men go that route, they’re sick of us. Wtf? Why do so many things get flipped into an indictment against black women?
LOL at Robin…cosign on J’s friends!
Paul: we all know Black woman are wayyyy behind when it comes to being nasty……you’ll still think A LOT of things are gross.
Soteria: A LOT of things ARE GROSS!
Well Pink, there are alot of issues with black women. But many will always have crazy things to say.
Paul, you speak some truth.
RJesq….btw I know you spell your name with a y…my bad…
King James, that was a nice poem…loved it!
King James…u posting love poems on a post about Brazilian booty???
I knew it….ha ha.
I’m just playing…..Love is the most beautiful thing in the world…..glad u found it bruh.
LOL. Soteria is right.
It is possible … to be … Too Damn Nasty.
Paul, you need to push away from that internet porn. Got you thinking gaping assholes are cute.
There’s a reason God put your mouth as far from your ass as possible.
Think about it.
Prostitution, whether in Brazil or on Martin Luther King Blvd., or after-hours at Magic City, is for men who like sex, but don’t like girls.
It’s a step towards faggadom. But let’s not get that started. (Still true though)
-
DV stop snitchin’ on yourself…..u talkin’ a lil too much about ass holes….who said anything about that? ha ha
LOL Nah Paul.
You talkin’ about Sistas aint “Nasty enough”.
Not “Nasty enough”?
What you mean by that?
Is “Nasty” something one wants from his woman?
That’s like saying Sistas aint “Shitty enough”.
or
Sistas aint “Funky enough”.
Give me an example of something Nasty you couldn’t get from sistas and had to go elsewhere.
… yuck.
DV, “Is “Nasty” something one wants from his woman?”
all jokes aside…..seriously……is that a trick question?
Do you feel tricked?
Big J has a lot of friends. Some are squares who work on Wall Street; some are street hustlers; but most are in between or a little bit of both, kinda like J himself. Me, I’m a thug in a suit.
Thanks folks… love fits everywhere!
DV and Paul… Yall got me rolling over here!
Thanks DV….for defending black women.
If I recall, Wayne was on the same bullshit as Paul not long ago. Sittin on my couch talkin about his wife had to be damn near a virgin, but then the next week criticizing black women for not “being nasty enough.”
Although I doubt neither Wayne nor Paul actually mean what they say, I’m glad you provided some much needed perspective and context.
Is “Nasty” something one wants from his woman?”
is that a trick question?
No, Paul that aint a trick question. Its a real question that challenges the made for TV rhetoric that threatens substantive, long lasting relations between man and woman.
P, you made the original statement, but now wonder whether you’ve been tricked when that statement is applied in the practical sense. Interesting aint it!
Robyn….my strong Black sista……
You completely misunderstood the rhetorical question i was asking DV…..What “threatens substantive, long lasting relations between man and woman.” is woman that is not willing to do whatever (within reason) to make her man happy……get off the high horse…..just swallow it…don’t spit it out.
I chose not to answer DVs question because it’s too many suspect individuals making post…first King James posting love poems….next DV fantasizing about ass holes….Hence….I’m keeping what’s “nasty” to myself…not trying to get anyone excited.
Of course every man wants a freak in the sheets that’s a lady in the streets…..DON’ KID YOURSELF.
*don’t kid yourself
Paul, I aint even touching that one.
Big Wayne was gonna stay out of this one, but my girl RJ just HAD to pull a brother in:
” If I recall, Wayne was on the same bullshit as Paul not long ago. Sittin on my couch talkin about his wife had to be damn near a virgin, but then the next week criticizing black women for not “being nasty enough.”
Check it:
Big Wayne’s statement was that 7 was too many penises for me to knowingly accept. Especially considering that every man who enters your body has conquered you. Big Wayne’s wife could not have possibly been weak enough to have been conquered by 7 diferent men. Big Wayne could accept nonstop daily sexual activity from a past long term relationship much sooner than the former.
2. Big Wayne challenges you to find an excerpt of his words anywhere on this blog where he “criticized black women for not being nasty enough” . You won’t find it, because it doesn’t exist. What you may, however, find is where Big Wayne submitted that Latinas and “others” are more submissive, and therefore perform certain traditional acts that many black women dont or wont.
Brings me to the topic of the post. First, let me say I have never been to Rio. But I know many who have.
I didn’t read the article but from prior posts it seems like it says Black men do this to shun or escape Black women, allow me to validate that point. It is true, but misleading. See men do this to escape the American mode of thinking. The courting, the dating, the bullshit backtalk, the fronting, the game playing, which can exist in Anerican society. Not just ours. They want to cut to the chase.
What heterosexual single man (besides DV)would not want to experience the land where he is truly king? The land where what you want…you get. The land where the women who you would only see in magazines or tv are a dime a dozen. The land where the 24 year old 8.5 piece has low self esteem because she realizes that her stock falls every year and the high schools just churned out a whole new shipment. Oh, and It is not only about sex. While I’m certain that guys travel around the world for sex, do you think it is a coincidence that this book addresses areas of Latin influence? Where men reign supreme? These men who travel to these places are met and greeted with a (albeit feigned) warmth and submissiveness that ALL MEN WANT, but can’t get at home.
And the money? Who cares about the money? The memories last longer.
But the downside of this is that when done excessively, these trips can prevent a man from being able to bond successfully with a woman…in our culture. As the courtship, dating, etc are part of the game. Once you have decided you don’t need to play the game anymore things have gone awry. (eg. Why would I put up with this bullshit from this average looking broad when I can fly 3 hours away and be treated like a king by a dimepiece?)
There’s one more critical piece to it. But I don’t think the women of TSO can handle that part. Prod me, I might just give it.
Disclaimer: Nothing in the prior paragraphs was intended to promote prostitution, promiscuity, infideliy, sex trips, etc.
Consider yourself prodded Wayne.
Don’t get scared now. Just be sure and include another disclaimer.
:-). I’ll admit I’m messing with you today.
first King James posting love poems….next DV fantasizing about ass holes….Hence….I’m keeping what’s “nasty” to myself…not trying to get anyone excited.
lol Paul…you’re a funny ass dude.
RJ
There is a Chinese curse that says, “May you get what you wish for most”
Cuidado!
Negro we aint Chinese. If you have more wisdom to spit, write it. I like reading your stuff.
There’s another Chinese saying, ‘It is a poor rat with one hole.’
omg Big Wayne, just tell us the rest. i promise you we can ‘handle’ it.
Paul
first King James posting love poems….next DV fantasizing about ass holes….Hence….I’m keeping what’s “nasty” to myself…not trying to get anyone excited.
ROTFLMOA!
Aight RJ, since you ask so nicely.
Although Big Wayne has never been to Rio he has backpacked all through Costa Rica. He’s hitchhiked through San Jose, visited the volcanos of Arenal, surfed 6footers in Jaco and hiked through the rain forests of Limon and Puerto Viejo. Big Wayne has worked in Caracas and vacationed in Margarita Island off the Coast of Venezula. He has been detained at the airport in Barranquilla, has sailed the waters of Cartagena and has eaten with strangers in Cali. He has even had the pleasure of witnessing the beauty of the district federale that is Santo Domingo.
Throughout my travels to Latin America, one thing is consistent:
THEY ARE FINE AS HELL!
The average chick in Latin America is hotter than the average chick in the states. Remember, I’m just the messenger. All brothas want a fine ass woman. (of course, there are exceptions to every rule) In this country, the fine ass women are doing porn, are models/actresses hung up on the Hollywood lifestyles, or are being (or have been) saved by some dude with major chips, thus making those women largely unavailable to the progressive brother clocking a cool 6 fig income, living a middle class life, unwilling or unable to break himself.
When I was younger I thought that only a loser would go all the way to another country to get himself a bride. I no longer feel that way.
Disclaimer: Remember, I’m just the messenger
See Robyn,
It’s these little fake ass playas got to fly 5,000 miles to spit game to a 19 year old undernourished prostitute to feel good about themselves.
Chick don’t even speak English, and these 30+ bustas, running up credit cards trying to catch up on the punany they didn’t get in high school.
Deluded with alcohol they think she actually digs his pork eatin’ ass, not realizing he’s the 3rd dude tonight she’s called “Pappi.”
As far as nasty, if a woman digs you, she’ll do whatever you want her to do. Depending on how much you dig her, will determine what it is you’ll have her do.
That’s why I said - these cats like sex, but don’t like girls.
Talkin’ about Sistas aint Nasty Enough. Translation: Sistas don’t like your punk ass enough.
-
As far as nasty, if a woman digs you, she’ll do whatever you want her to do. Depending on how much you dig her, will determine what it is you’ll have her do. - DV
1/3 of me hates DV. 2/3 of me wants him to be my Babby Daddy.
I agree w/ DV on the no game part…..u can be butt ugly w/ NO MONEY and still pull a dime if you have a good mouth piece.
“As far as nasty, if a woman digs you, she’ll do whatever you want her to do. Depending on how much you dig her, will determine what it is you’ll have her do”. - DV
whatever….we all know robyn ain’t doing NOTHING she thinks is gross no matter if she’s head over heals got it bad in love w/ the dude…..right Esq.?
DV
“It’s these little fake ass playas got to fly 5,000 miles to spit game to a 19 year old undernourished prostitute to feel good about themselves.
Chick don’t even speak English, and these 30+ bustas, running up credit cards trying to catch up on the punany they didn’t get in high school.
Deluded with alcohol they think she actually digs his pork eatin’ ass, not realizing he’s the 3rd dude tonight she’s called “Pappi.” ”
Sounds like you’ve been there a few times DV… What happen you couldn’t even pull a pro?? Next time take off the pumps prior (Like De La Hoya)
I love Anonymous. That is the line of the year, BTW.
DV: As far as nasty, if a woman digs you, she’ll do whatever you want her to do. Depending on how much you dig her, will determine what it is you’ll have her do.
This, DV, is EXACTLY what I would have said had I not been lady enough to decline response to Paul’s “swallow vs. spit” comment. For fear of a reversion to junior high, I left that alone. I knew someone would fill the void.
I am laughing my ass off.
Big Wayne, RJ and DV - y’all are KILLING me today.
I’m kinda in the middle. I can see how flying to Brazil and living out your fantasies with a dime piece could be the greatest thing ever. It’s just not my thing.
DV is right though. I also know straight up GAMELESS LOSERS that go down there like every 6 months cuz they can’t get anything in LA. WACK. Many of the nickas who keeping flying to Rio are the same ones who I sometimes think are . . . . you guessed it. . .homos.
and I can’t even have babies cuz I am a dude
Oh WOW!
and with that I’m back to work!
Anon,
You speak of “pullin a pro” like that’s some accomplishment. Don’t say that no more. (Said in that motherly tone).
Anon,
You speak of “pullin a pro” like that’s some accomplishment. Don’t say that no more. -RJEsq
Larry Elder is that you?
DV’s last post shuts this whole thread down.
Larry Elder has the balls to say clearly that prostitution is some nasty shit?
He, too, would rather that n*groes find a woman and actually try and relate to her, than to cruise some crack head infested back alley?
Well good for Larry Elder!
Sounds like you’ve been there a few times DV… What happen you couldn’t even pull a pro?? Next time take off the pumps prior (Like De La Hoya) Anon
…
…
… Aint nothin’ worse than a corny Negro who tries to hard. Anon, go play somewhere.
Anon,
You speak of “pullin a pro” like that’s some accomplishment. Don’t say that no more. -RJEsq
http://youtube.com/watch?v=8s8ppoQY5AI
RJEsq = Larry Elder
I must say…this was QUITE an entertaining thread.
DV, bruh you could not have said it any better.
Call it arrogant, call it confidence, call it whatever but when you handling yours and showing that woman attention there AINT nuttin she won’t do for you. I done seen and had a fair share of attention and no one gets down for you like a Black woman. No contest. End of discussion. No disrespect to brothers who get it how they live…or don’t.
As for the Rio bit, I have a gang of dudes who hit it up every year (some 2 and 3 times) and to me it is a self defeating act that I can’t relate to (anymore). I wanted to in my early 20’s when it was new to my crew. But there is something about trying to do that now I can’t honestly validate doing at 31. Instinctively, I like the chase. Hell, every man *should* in my opinion. But what do I know? Paying a lil girl do all that stuff your wife/girl won’t do aint the business to me. Niggas need to try communicating what they want from a woman and they would be surprised what they get. Straight up.
“You mean to tell me that not acting like a player and simply being straight forward and forth right will get me “this”? SOLD!”
My thoughts…
SDIC
this has got to be one of the most hilarious convos i’ve read on TSO since it’s inception.
thank you!
DV:
It’s these little fake ass playas got to fly 5,000 miles to spit game to a 19 year old undernourished prostitute to feel good about themselves.
Chick don’t even speak English, and these 30+ bustas, running up credit cards trying to catch up on the punany they didn’t get in high school.
Deluded with alcohol they think she actually digs his pork eatin’ ass, not realizing he’s the 3rd dude tonight she’s called “Pappi.”
As far as nasty, if a woman digs you, she’ll do whatever you want her to do. Depending on how much you dig her, will determine what it is you’ll have her do.
That’s why I said - these cats like sex, but don’t like girls.
Talkin’ about Sistas aint Nasty Enough. Translation: Sistas don’t like your punk ass enough.
soteria:
These are the most classic 6 paragraphs that I have read in a long time…DV, you need to really consider writing a book and show these boys what time it is…you’ve already pre-sold 10 copies…cause I got about 10 b*tch niccas I wanna put up on game…..PREAAAAACCHHH!!!
DV is tha TRUTH!
“cause I got about 10 b*tch niccas I wanna put up on game…..PREAAAAACCHHH!!!”
LMAO! Soteria, make that 20 pre-sold copies! haha
LMAO @ Soteria!
Hey folks.. LOVE is everywhere.. even when talking about brazeel-yan bootay
but this was funny. good stuff
DV.
True dat, brother, all of it.
If a guy with a ’six-figure income’ living in LA cannot get next to the woman he wants he is a chump. perhaps he needs to be a bit more creative in his approach.
Here’s a hint: while women do enjoy the things money can by - like everybody - what they crave most in a man is exposure to something new. And discovering new things requires an open mind not an open wallet.
I know a guy who runs trips to Brazil and overwhelmingly he always talks about the way the women make a man feel as opposed to sex.
And as far as ‘nasty’ and sex are concerned, whatever two people agree is not ‘nasty’ isn’t nasty. I draw the line at anal. And a guy who wants/likes anal and his woman won’t give it to him ought o find another woman. And vice-versa; this here johnson will never try it. That’s’nasty’ to me. But if your thing, get down.’
” I draw the line at anal. And a guy who wants/likes anal and his woman won’t give it to him ought o find another woman.’
Anal sex is gay sex. Whether with a man or a woman.
Y’all nickas are KILLING me.
I also draw the line at anal sex. That orifice is not meant for pleasure.
This is a very entertaining convo. Overall, if you are a high-five figure man or above who is interested in African-American women, you should have no trouble pulling.
On the other hand, I may want to read this book and suggest it for our book club. We are running out of stuff to read about. I’m no fan of “street lit.”
i tell ya…i might have to stay off this blog….pres was already suspect…now he bringing BACK up ass holes….then u got all the other half way homosexuals jumping in talkin’ bout ass holes…….as big j would say, “y’all niccas killin’ me!!!”
Pres, “And as far as ‘nasty’ and sex are concerned, whatever two people agree is not ‘nasty’ isn’t nasty.”
whatever…u trippin…..i like saying, “dang gul…u nasty!….and i love it”
nasty is the goal i’m shooting for bruh.
pres ain’t suspect, he just minds his own business.
If you evere find a male onthis earth who says they had ANY kind of sexual encounter with me they are lying.
At the same time, if that’s yo thang, go to it. Not my business.